Bucket List Or Mindfulness

A Mindful Pursuit of Destiny

I have observed an interesting phenomenon in life. What we desire and seek in life can rarely be discovered by pursuing that thing alone. 

This week, fellow Substack writer Don Boivin wrote a thought-provoking essay, "My Bucket List is Empty.” I read it at least three times! I enjoy Don‘s work because we share a passion for truth. If you’re unfamiliar with Don‘s work, I will post a link to check out his work that inspired this week's essay!

Have you ever noticed that the wisdom of Spiritual and Success / Performance gurus sometimes seems contradictory? On one hand, we hear messages like, “Show up powerfully.” “Be all in.” “Dig deep.” “Nothing is impossible.” “Follow your dreams!”

On the other hand, we hear messages like.  “Let go”. “Happiness is attained by letting go,” “Embrace the slow life,” “Detach from desire,” and “Detach from the results.”

Both sides do well at articulating the life we don’t want and creating success stories for a better way of living.

This brings us to ask questions like: Do dreams matter, or are we to be satisfied with life as it is? What does it mean to be mindful and Zen versus passionately embracing a life of meaning and living fully alive?  

Which is it? Is the answer to a meaningful life passionately pursuing my dreams? Or is the answer found in letting go and simply finding joy in being?  

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The Bucket List: 

Most of us are familiar with the term bucket list. I think it’s a relatively new term. According to Reddi, It didn’t exist prior to 2007 and the release of the movie The Bucket List.  If you’re unfamiliar with it, it’s a story of a Corporate billionaire, Edward Cole, and a working-class mechanic, Carter Chambers, who meet in a hospital room due to a terminal illness diagnosis.  Through their relationship, they discover they have a lot of unlived life. They list things they want to do before they “kick the bucket.”  Together, they tackle their bucket list and make some pretty amazing discoveries.

Many people have created their bucket lists as a result of the movie. As an innkeeper here in the Adirondack Mountains, we have seen our fair share of Guests staying with us because of their bucket lists. It might be climbing the High Peaks or witnessing the glory of the spectacular fall colors tapestry.

The point is that the concept of a bucket list has come to represent looking at one’s life and making a list of all the things one would love to do during one's life on this amazing place called Earth.   

Don makes this statement.  “I think the problem with the attachment to bucket lists is that it’s grounded in the view that this one short life is all there is. What desperation this view leads to! What clinging and grasping and craving!”  

He raises a valid point that I have also observed. However, it also piqued my curiosity, causing me to dig deeper into the destiny paradox.

Destiny / The Reason 

Humanity's journey is amazing. If we stop and look at our history as humans, it is filled with twists and turns. There are stories of wars, divisions, hatred, and destruction, as well as stories of love, learning to work together, and unity. Behind it all is a driving force, a seeking of clarity, and an attempt to understand what it is all about. 

Simply put, humanity has been on a journey of gradually remembering the reason behind it all: to find the reason we are alive and to discover our destiny.  

As a result, we have developed many different methods of attempting to unveil “The Reason.”  For simplicity's sake, I will boil it down to two.

Spirituality / Mindfulness

“Happiness can be attained by letting go, including letting go of your ideas about happiness.”~ Nhat Hanh

In ancient times, the pursuit of knowledge and understanding of life, the world, and the universe was reserved for monks, priests, and monasteries. The masses seemed content to spend their time hunting for food and fighting one another for survival! Gradually, we have become more aware that there must be more to life, although we still fight one another way too much!  

The spiritual or mindful approach attempts to embrace authentic reality and enter that state through meditation, mindfulness, and spiritual connection, leading to fulfilling “The Reason!”

Science / The Passionate Pursuit:

How bad do you want it?~ Tim McGraw

We humans are inquisitive by nature. We want to know how things work. This is what science is all about. We have collected knowledge from our observations for centuries, attempting to understand our world, life, and the universe. We have developed sciences within the sciences. We have formed much of this knowledge into what we call laws. Laws are simply the formulas by which nature operates.

The scientific approach highly values these laws and builds a method of finding “The Reason” based on aligning our lives with them.

The purpose of this essay is not to develop an in-depth understanding of the spiritual and scientific approaches. Instead, it is to highlight the contrast and find the missing piece that unites them. 

The Destiny Paradox!

I have observed an interesting phenomenon in life. What we desire and seek in life can rarely be discovered by pursuing that thing alone. 

We live in a very holistic universe. Everything is connected. Spiritually minded people call this “oneness.”  Science calls it the “unified field.” Pursuing one thing in a holistic universe is like seeing a beautiful tree and desiring to enjoy its beauty, cut it down, and plant it in our backyard. We all know it will die because it’s no longer connected to its roots.

What we desire and seek has “roots,” if you will. It is part of a larger equation. It could be said that the tree is the byproduct of seed, earth, sun, and water. Remove any one of those things, and that tree will not exist.

The same principle applies to discovering and living our Destiny. Destiny is the byproduct of a larger story. It is the result of remembering and reclaiming our true identity and the reason we are alive.

Read My Essay “The Destiny Paradox”

So what is it… Bucket list or destiny?

Because our hearts naturally desire that which unlocks our unique design crafted for our role in a cosmic story, we are naturally drawn to the concept of a bucket list. However, disconnected from realizing our true selves and identities, that list becomes a means to temporary pleasure that falls far short of destiny.  

Attachment to that list as a means of a meaningful life has a slim chance of producing one. Instead, it leads to a life as Don, articulated of desperation, clinging! However, for the ones who have remembered and reclaimed their true identity, that list represents the things they are naturally gifted to enjoy and bring to our world.  It represents their dream that they have come to earth to live. Rather than simply a list for their enjoyment, it becomes a list of ways to bless their world!

In other words, bucket lists are powerless to create a meaningful life of fulfillment but are an essential part of the larger destiny equation.  

Bucket lists are best not for the discovery of destiny but for the expression of it!

The SnowGoose Bed & Breakfast.  One of my biggest Bucket List fulfillments!

To sum it up, unless our bucket lists represent our true selves living out a role in the cosmic story, they will become a checklist that we continually check off, but our lives remain clingy and striving. When they represent the reason we are alive, unfolding as an expression of the divine within our role in a cosmic story, it is then, and only then, that bucket lists fulfill their purpose! 

In the end, the movie was not really about bucket lists. It was about healing, friendship, and living a life of joy—about discovering the joy of being alive!

So, by all means, make your bucket list… 

Not to enjoy being alive but for the joy that you are!  Here’s to the life of Destiny!

Love and Blessings 

Wayne

Read Don’s Essay!